ALL WE HAVE IS THIS MOMENT

All we have is this moment

to put the love into motion

Yesterday is history

So why don't you be here with me ?

Four years ago, life was one messed up rubix cube waiting to be solved. Like a total disaster without direction and no clue how to fix it. I was nothing but a dreamer wanting to have a fairy tale life. But in one time, I ended up feeling like a rubbish. I had a trust issue, even until now I can't easily trust people, I'm a Paranoid (with a capital P).

Four years ago, I made some mistakes that made me growing up. I didn't listen to what people said because I was a stubborn one. I was lost in between 'yes' or 'not at all' and I said 'yes' all the time. I said yes to trouble and wavy life. I said yes to wrong turns instead of going straight. The heart wanted what it want, that's what I thought.

Through this day, I wake up to something I called logic. Fighting for something I love won't always go smooth, but I learn what's worthy in life. People might call me arrogant and heartless coz I'm easily judging people who still do what I have left. I still don't understand how I should live, still don't know how to deal with life. What's different is I use my brain more than my heart this time. The heart still always be hungry for big things, but the brain tells me to take it slow. I don't always come up strong, but I see life with a different point of view. I learn to earn not to spend, though it's hard for me still. I put myself first. I still have a trust issue but I handle it quite well. In one way or another, I feel I have myself under control. So, I'm a grateful one.